What's next?

When we finally get what we want, what's next?

In relation to my previous post, I must say that I am getting what I want after all. My mother gave in after my sister convinced her. I don't know what she said but she convinced my mother. And I could not be more than thankful. I'm actually headed home in a few days to embark on this new journey. But I now face certain issues and what ifs that I must get out of my head otherwise, I will go crazy.

Issues:

• I do not want telling people that I am going home because I could not find a job. Simply, I don't want to tell the whole world how my "Plan A" failed. 
• I also don't want telling them that I have a "Plan B" and that this plan is the reason why I'm home earlier than planned.
• What if "Plan B" also fails and my mom lectures me about it? That she's right and I'm wrong and what not?
• I hate leaving my aunt here all alone.
• I hate myself for wanting this so bad in the first place but now that I have it, I'm having doubts about the plan pushing through. 

I'm so weird. Really, I don't know what I want. I suck at life. Life is totally screwing me over. 

But I do know that I am so excited to go home. I miss my family. I miss my friends. Unemployment sucks.